With Open Arms

I think I'm ready to embrace life. If you care to hear me out, then read on. Otherwise, don't mind me, if you know me well enough, I get these "High On Life" moods here and there so I try to take advantage of them and write down my positivity so I can read them again when I'm down.

Anyway, moving on.

I'm ready to move on to bigger and better things. Whether it's to replace old feelings, to forget about the past. I'm just so darn tootin' tired of this life that I wanna move on. I'm constantly struggling and fighting to be happy and I'm just ready to Just Be Happy.

I have amazing friends that will always be there for me. I've gained new friends that I'm just so happy about. I've spend my summer really well this year. All I need is someone to share my happiness and love with, but I know God has someone for me, I just have to wait REAAAALLLLLYYYY patiently for that person. I know it's gonna be worth it. I just have to keep doing what I'm good at, eliminate my shortcomings and weaknesses, and just go on. Keep fighting. I'm 26 years old. I don't want to be the last to get married, to be the oldest mom in a Parents-Teachers meeting. I wanna be a young urban professional.

And I'ma do just that.

Just Dance.

    So this is really frustrating. Lately, I've bombarded my life with anything dance. I've been obsessing with choreography videos by Kyle Hanagami, my friend updating her Twitter with her dance adventures, and movies about dance.
    When I was 7, my grandma insisted on signing me up for ballet classes but I wouldn't go for it because I wanted karate lessons. Ballet = Girls. Karate = Boys. So I ended up signed up for neither. Years later, here I am looking at dance classes at local dance academies or park districts around my area. I don't want competitive dancing. I just want to learn how to dance. I want to learn how tap, belly dancing (even though I'm sure I can't force my body to move like that), jazz, ballroom, and of course hiphop. Heck, I'll even give ballet a shot.. or Zumba. I just want to move my feet and dance.
    I'm a clubhead and sometimes I get frustrated because I really wish I can get clubbing out of my system. But I really love going out and dancing the night away. Granted, I would never bootydance with someone that's not my boyfriend, but still. I can't sing to save my soul, I can't model (which I really wanted to back in highschool), I can't act, I can't even play an instrument. But I know that I can follow rhythm. I'm not flexible, I can't do the splits or cartwheels but I swear with every dance bone in my body, I can dance.
    This obsession with wanting to learn how to dance increased after I had a Step Up movie marathon with my roommates a few weeks ago. So much so that "Good Dancer" has now been added to my ever-growing list of Guy Standards.
    Is that bad?

The truest expression of a people is in its dance and in its music.  Bodies never lie.  ~Agnes de Mille

     I need to do something significant. I'm going to dance. Hmmmm, where should I go?

Chicago Notes

    Since I didn't have a pen and paper handy, I was pretty much clickety-clacking away on the Notes section of my iPod Touch. I totally forgot about my notes until minutes earlier when I was cleaning up the random notes I've saved up.

• While waiting for the Chicago-bound train to arrive, everyone inside the station were nose-deep in their smartphones. No human interaction of any kind. Not a timid smile, a nod of acknowledgement, a good morning, nada.

• Everyone was also sitting ridiculously spaced out enough that no person can sit in between. A bench that would have sat 8 people has four people (and their bags) sitting comfortably. Tsk tsk.
• No man offered a woman a seat. Even when that woman was standing next to a man who was sitting with his legs crossed.
• As the train was rolling by the scenery, I saw a plane land. The sight of it made me feel trapped. I need to be somewhere other that where I am and what I am right now. I need to finish this year the right way so that I can breathe again. So that I can feel like (at the very least) have the option of soaring again.
• We passed by a cemetery and I saw a car driving slowly inside. I'm sure he's going to visit a loved one. It made me feel really sad for him. I hope he's happy now.
• I've never had to retrieve legal documents before. I walked inside the Daley Center (which used to be the Chicago Civic Center) and everything was fast-paced and everyone was walking with a purpose. It gave me such a headrush! I wanna be part of this kind of setting! It would probably get too intense for me but I guess I work best under pressure.
• While in line, I saw a guy donning a pair of Dr. Dre Beats Headphone. What a bad-ass. I'm jealous. Those babies cost AT LEAST $300.
• To celebrate my successful Chicago Adventure, I stopped by a bookstore that had a sale going on. I got two books for a dollar each, so.. SCORE!!

•  They say never buy groceries when you're hungry, and all I can say is "True Dat!"  What was supposedly a quick lunch from the McDonald's dollar menu turned out to be a $12 tasteless lunch from the Corner Bakery. I'm sure it's not that bad, but this particular sandwich I got was horrible. -blech-
• I wish I had a real camera with me (not a digital camera, but a digital SLR camera), because there were a lot of things that warranted a decent photograph and all I had was my handy dandy iPod.

    Now that I am semi comfortable with going downtown by myself, I can't wait for summer to arrive! I can go to the museums anytime I want to, Chinatown, even just chill at the lake or Millenium Park. Chicago and I are going to have a very good relationship this summer year.